Tuesday, February 12, 2008

The Four Greatest Words In the English Language

"Pitchers and catchers report."

It doesn't matter how much snow is on the ground or how cold the wind chill factor makes it feel. It doesn't matter if you're wearing boots and pushing a shovel every morning. It doesn't even matter if Phil saw his shadow.

Thursday marks the official beginning of spring. The Chicago Cubs pitchers and catchers will report to Mesa, Arizona to begin training for the 2008 baseball season, my passion will awaken from its winter slumber and my mood will improve significantly. I don't have SAD --Seasonal Affective Disorder. I have BSAD--Baseball Seasonal Affective Disorder.

This season is particularly important for the Cubbies, as another losing effort will result in a centennial of World Series futility--and intense mockery from Cubs-haters the world over. But don't worry about that because this is the year!

To celebrate the joyous return of spring and Cubs baseball, I thought I would share the worst Cubs-themed video I've ever seen in my life. The following visual atrocity is the music video for Richard Marx's 1992 hit "Take This Heart." Disclaimer: I randomly came across this video on YouTube and am in no way a fan of the music produced by Richard Marx nor am I a proponent of the nearly mullet-like haircut sported by Marx and his band. I am also not responsible for any loss of hearing or vision induced by watching this video or the insanity that could follow from having this ditty stuck in your head the rest of the day. Enjoy!

When the Cubs reach the World Series this year, I sure hope Richard Marx makes the playoff roster...

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